Every now and again you get a great idea, that seems far fetched. Some would even deem it crazy. "That sounds nuts", "Why would you ever do that". The best ideas usually are tied hand in hand with those kind of sentiments. The worst is when they not only come from the outside in, but the combo punch of coming from within too.
Self doubt, man its a bitch.
We all have it (i think).
What do you do with it (i'm really asking)?
I used to just pretend like it didn't exist, but I realized in ignoring it, I was somehow just extending its grasp on me. Lately, I'm in the habit of really just letting it be, almost honoring it in a way. Meaning, as soon as I recognize it for what it is (which I'm proud to say, doesn't take me too long anymore… practice makes perfect), as soon as I name it for what it is, I acknowledge it, and then i'm able to actually let it go. My inner monologue literally goes something like this "I feel scared because of ___" … then I say "ok"… and then, almost always, its gone. And i'm back to making decisions based on truth and not fear, based on what I want, not what I doubt I can have.
About a year ago I had the idea to start a recording project, i dubbed it 52 in 52. My band and I will be releasing fifty two songs in fifty two weeks… one song per week for a whole year.
As soon as this crazy idea birthed itself in my head, my logical brain had sooooooo many things to say to the rest of my brain… again, the voice in my head: "what if you can't do it", "what if you release a shitty song", "you only get one chance at a first impression", "its going to be sooooo hard" - that one has a very whiney monolog voice attached to it - "what if i fail", "how am i supposed to write, record, mix and master all that", "screw that!!!" … and on and on.
But you know what, I really value growth above most other things in my life. And the best way I know how to grow, is to do, and do again, and again, and again. At the end of the day, the thing that excites me most, excites me louder than any voice in my head, or voice of doubt in the world, is the chance to learn from each and every song I write and record. I'm sure there will be some songs that I write that are better than others, and I'm sure that my band and I will achieve greater sonic bliss on some songs while tracking and producing each song, but you know what, each time, i'll be getting better at it. We'll be getting better at it.
So if you're at all interested in checking up on the progress, there will be several ways you can. Weekly social media blasts, and email list and the like.
At the end of the year,we will have people (like you!) vote on their favorite 10 songs, and release a very special album, curated by you.
Certainly expect some videos in the works too, again, picked by you the people.
So there it is, my crazy ass idea, but what the hell, you only live once, why not challenge yourself. Go big or go home, right?
Here's the link for week 1: https://soundcloud.com/nickbullock/lonely
happy new year
xo
